Bitcoiners Who Vote Have Much Higher Cases Of Erectile Dysfunction

A new study by the Texas Blockchain council has found alarming rates of erectile dysfunction in Bitcoiners who vote as the result of extremely low testosterone. The study found that 76.3% of voters who claimed to be Bitcoiners could not achieve an erection with assistance from either Testosterone replacement therapy, or ED drugs like Viagra. All of this points to the idea that men who vote are extreme beta males and that voting is bad for you.

The study sought to prove that Bitcoin voters had much higher testosterone than nonvoters but ended up proving the exact opposite. Only 7% of nonvoters struggled with maintaining an erection which is far lower than the average nocoiner which is struggling at about 50%. No coiners scored significantly better than Bitcoiners who voted, seeing as a large portion of nocoiners do not vote either.

One user on Bitcoin Twitter responded to the article by saying, "I used to have issues with my pecker until I stopped voting. I never was able to see the correlation. I just stopped hating myself and supporting people who hated me. I thought that's what changed. My wife is much happier now either way."

The study has shaken up the medical world to the point where even Anthony Fauci was forced to comment on it. He attempted to shift blame from voting to Bitcoin for the lack of male performance. Bitcoin Twitter was not convinced of the issue and began ridiculing him for being unable to perform.

Surprisingly, Dennis Porter and other lobbyists were silent on the issue. Elon Musk Tweeted the study, garnering over 5 million likes on Twitter. His tweet stated, "We need more people in this world, and it's clear that voting is dramatically dropping the birth rates. Voting appears to be danger to society."

Marty Bent was right when he said, "You can't vote your way out of this."