10 Best Excuses To Give Legal & HR Departments For Compliance Violations

10 Best Excuses To Give Legal & HR Departments For Compliance Violations

It happens to everyone — sometimes, despite your best efforts, you end violating one of your Bitcoin company's compliance policies . Though the grace of God is vast, the grace of your HR department may not be, so coming up with good excuses for compliance violations can be important.

The Bugle is here to save the day by providing you with the following list of the best excuses you can give your legal and HR departments when get caught being non-compliant:

  1. "I was trying to be extra productive so I turned my VPN off": Sometimes you end up violating compliance policies because of how super duper productive you are.
  2. "I wanted to provide EXCEPTIONAL customer service": Sometimes we take KYC too far by looking up privileged customer data to give them top notch customer service experiences.
  3. "I just wanted to use my own node to verify, not trust.": Your node is great for you but compliance will want to make sure the node your using is commercial grade.
  4. "I was making Bitcoin memes": You do know that the ability to create dank memes is good for Bitcoin right?
  5. "I had to own some no-coiners on X": Doing the Satoshi's work.
  6. "2fa slows me down": Providing exceptional customer service requires speed. 2fa slows everything down.
  7. "Just Stop Ordinals was DDoS'ing the servers": Sometimes protestors and cyber attackers make things difficult!
  8. "I was transacting adversarially": Acting within compliance 100% of the time goes against Game Theory, after all!
  9. "I wanted to make sure the product was thermodynamically sound": How can someone argue against the laws of thermodynamics?
  10. "Bitcoin was pumping": Everyone knows its impossible to stay focused when NGU is happening.

Feel free to use one or more of the excuses listed above, and you'll be golden. Become a master of the non-compliant excuse, and you can just do whatever you want!

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