GoFundMe Changes Terms And Services To Only Support Fundraisers For CIA Approved Causes

The CIA has reportedly fully taken over control of GoFundMe to prevent any sort of legal fundraisers for causes they do not expressly approve of. This was revealed after GoFundMe reportedly removed a legal fundraiser for the cofounder of Tornado Cash, Roman Storm. The fund was also meant to help defend the developer Alexey Pertsev. CIA agents reportedly caught wind of the situation and shut the fundraiser down in order to try and prevent the two individuals from being able to raise money for their legal defense. This was done in order to scare other developers of privacy related products, working to help thwart the CIA from illegally and immorally tracking everyone.

The CIA has also begun using the fundraising site to raise money for their clandestine activities, artificially promoting these fundraisers on social media, via their embedded assets in Facebook, Twitter, etc. In the past, the CIA would raise money for clandestine activities by doing things like smuggling drugs into Los Angelos, and we likely do not want to know the other ways they raised money. Fortunately, between congress and GoFundMe, the CIA will have funds to go keep all of us safe from the bad guys.

Unfortunately, the CIA has not been able to fully capture other revenue streams like accepting Bitcoin on a website using BTCPay, or individuals setting up Geyser accounts. Many have learned from the Canadian Trucker Protests that the CIA can get pretty jealous when organic dissident movements happen that conflict with their goals.