Pfizer Releases New Pill That Makes Stupid People Stop Buying Memecoins And NFTs

The FDA has just announced that they will announce the approval of an exciting new drug that purports to increase individuals IQ's. One of the reported side effects in clinical trials is that indviduals engaging with the crypto ecosystem lose 99.9% interest in trading memecoins and NFTs. Congressman Brad Sherman held a press conference to celebrate the news and went as far to suggest that the drug be put into the water supply to help combat what he deems as a public health emergency.

Gemini released an email to their customers warning them from taking the controversial drug as it has not had sufficient testing to understand the true side effects. Exchanges and brokering services such as Coinbase, Robinhood, and WeBull also sent similar letters to their customers. The crypto market took a massive plunge on the announcement of the announcement.

This marks the first time that a drug has the potential to cripple an entire industry. Previous disruptive drugs and or have consistently been attacked by established industries. There has been much energy put towards stifling the growth of the cryptocurrency industry, and this may be one reason why it's being embraced.

CNN aired a segment covering the drug, celebrating it's ability to potentially help struggling students in public schools. Jason Williams responded to this by saying, "This is a bunch of trash. I never thought I would get rug pulled by Pfizer. I just bought a really expensive advertisement for $PEPE."

Crypto twitter exploded in protest to the new drug, vowing to remain on the left side of the bell curve. Bitcoin Twitter on the other hand appears to be unfazed by the news, and is of the impression that Bitcoin is different from general Twitter. Cory Klippsten expressed his support for the new drug, saying that it will be infinitely more effective than the SEC regulating securities.