Saudi Arabia Legalizes Bitcoin, Stipulates Women Must Use Their Husband's Node
Riyadh – The Kingdom of Saudi Arabia has legalized private ownership and trading of Bitcoin, the Saudi Ministry of Finance announced today. The announcement comes after several mixed messages but no official laws regarding Bitcoin in the Kingdom over the last several years.
Minutes released by the Finance Ministry detailing the discussion between Saudi leaders revealed the major point of contention over Bitcoin's legalization. Conservative Saudi leaders wanted to forbid women from being able to own and use Bitcoin while more contemporary leaders felt it was too difficult to enforce thus not worth the effort. However, leaders came to a compromise and added language to the law that requires women to use their husband's node for all transactions. In effect, only married women can use Bitcoin although the Ministry signaled that soon widows will be able to use the Ministry of Finance's node.
Japan Following Saudi Arabia's Lead?
Demand for Bitcoin has been slow to catch on but recent inflation in the Yen has accelerated its growth causing Japanese lawmakers to reconsider regulation which has thus far been mostly anti-Bitcoin. However, after hearing about Saudi Arabia's regulations preventing women from using Bitcoin, Japanese regulators were inspired. "We have many incel men in Japan. They live at home and no get married. This is bad for Japan. We need fewer incels. Incels create problem. Look at United States, for example." A Japanese economist told The Bugle.
The solution? Allow the Central Bank of Japan to continue printing money at levels unrivaled in the industrialized world. The ensuing inflation will continue to drive demand for Bitcoin and cause it to concentrate into the hands of single Japanese men with excess savings. By requiring women to use their husband's node, like in Saudi Arabia, it will incentivize Japanese women to find a husband. "More family more prosperity".
Incel Experts from the University of California at Berkeley warned that enriching incels was a high risk experiment. "We don't want a situation where these incels become wealthy and rediscover the power and allure of the Samurai." said Professor Avery Klein. He added "A fraternity of incels who become rich, powerful, and motivated could easily evolve to become volcel (voluntarily celibate). Volcels with money who become organized and angry.. they can cause real problems. I almost wonder if this is a CIA campaign to use Japan to keep China in check."
